Kindly give me feedback on my essay

The Road Not Taken by Ruskin Bond emphasizes the challenges we come across in our lives and whether we dwell upon them to face them or not. Any situation always has two sides to it and choosing the right one takes a lot of courage and patience. People generally choose the easier way around and opt for conventional actions, but the ones who take risky actions have the edge of becoming successful in life.
Taking risky actions unanimously will be of no good unless they know its pros and cons quite well. Any problem requires deep analysis of the consequences its solution will have. Imagine a 10th-standard student who is not good at studies and just before the night of the final exams decides to quit school. This is quite a big risky action and he took it without thinking of the consequences. There can be a chance that he follows his passion and becomes like CarryMinati but not everyone is like him. There are more chances of him failing in his life if he doesnā€™t have a plan on what to do further. There are several young YouTubers who opted to choose this unconventional path as a carrier choice and dropped out of college or school, most of them are still struggling and are depressed in their lives. Now they realize that was not even what they liked doing and chose it just as an excuse from studies. But there are also several others who are successful in this field and are very content with it. the difference in both these cases is just the planning and execution. Both had the same passion and zeal in the starting but only those survived who knew what the consequences could be and how to tackle them.
Analyzing your choices gives you the perks of dwelling on the problems beforehand you could be facing them. There will be hurdles even then because no one knows how and when the situation becomes troublesome. But trusting your actions and having faith in your efforts and planning gives you the courage to fight them.
We hear a few stories of successful people who opted for ā€˜The Road Not Takenā€™ and in all of their stories we hear the risk they took, and what they had to achieve what they have today. Following a conventional pat will always make you regret not opting for the risky one. But with that risky choice there comes a lot of pressure. You can come over it only if you know what the consequences could be. You have to make yourself strong enough to face those consequences.
Elon Musk knew what he had put at stake while taking those harsh decisions but because he had good planning and the visualization of his success was so clear that today he is one of the richest people in the world.
if you have the courage to be successful, the patience to achieve that success, the determination, and perseverance to work hard for it, and the right plan to realize your visualization into action and turn your risky actions into successful results then no one can stop you from reaching the clouds.
Sometimes in life, we should also go with our gut feeling if it is that strong and despite knowing the consequences if our heart says to do it then we must try it. Life is too short to dwell on all the rights and wrongs so sometimes do what your gut says. For instance, many successful captains in sports take risky decisions knowing they can be wrong and at times they even work in favor.

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Hi @Profitable_cyan_falc, welcome! Iā€™m happy to review your essay.

I would agree with our e-grader on this one and would also score it a 4.0. The most important thing you can do to improve your score is to write more. Your essay is about 600 words and you should be aiming for a minimum of 800. If you run out of time and arenā€™t able to write more, you should at least combine your paragraphs, as having a paragraph of just one or two sentences really highlights how short the essay is.

Your writing quality is pretty good overall. Nice work with spelling, varied vocabulary, and the use of examples. Your grammar is decent but could use a little work. For instance, try not to start sentences with joining words like ā€œbutā€ - we talk like that conversationally but it makes your writing feel less polished. Some of your sentences are quite long. Using a few long sentences with correct grammar and punctuation will enhance your essay, but having too many isnā€™t good either. If you have a few long sentences in a row, try mixing them up by splitting the middle ones into shorter parts.

Iā€™ve also run it through an alternative grader weā€™ve developed. It scored the essay as a 4.5, and confirmed that from a quantitative perspective, the main thing holding you back is the length and related traits. Hereā€™s the analysis:

Bottom line - just practice writing more and you should easily be able to reach a 5.0 or higher!